Divorce and Your Kids
Divorce is hard on everyone, and sadly, this is especially true for the kids who’re involved. After all, they have absolutely no control regarding what’s happening to their family. As nearly impossible as this divorce is for you, it’s even more difficult for your children, which—of course—is heartbreaking. There are, however, specific things that you can do to help your kids out.
Put Your Kids First
As parents, we always put our kids first, but there are some variations on this theme when it comes to divorce (especially for younger children). No matter what their other parent is getting up to (including not paying child support), don’t share that information with your children. It won’t do anyone any good—it certainly won’t help you, and since there’s absolutely nothing the kids can do about it, it will only serve to increase their natural anxiety about what’s going to happen and about things they simply don’t understand and cannot control.
Whether your kids are primarily living with you or with your ex, always be where you say you’ll be when you say you’ll be there (within your utmost ability). Children—especially younger children—can internalize the disappointment they associate with a parent who doesn’t show up on time or who isn’t home when he or she has promised.
Divide And Conquer
Children often find it embarrassing and confusing to lug a suitcase full of belongings back and forth between households—like a guest. Your home is your children’s home and your ex’s home is your children’s home, and it’s best for all involved if your children have what they need—to the extent possible—at both locations. Don’t squabble with your ex over what he or she did with little Johnny’s snow pants; just pick up an extra pair.
Mums The Word
Your divorce is hard—it may even be epic—but sharing that burden with your children is not the thing to do. Talk to a trusted friend, loved one, counselor, or your divorce attorney, but try to keep such talk out of your children’s earshot. The kids love you both, and they may find it traumatizing to feel disloyal to either of you—even if it’s just listening to negative pronouncements about the absent parent. No one’s perfect—especially not when going through a divorce—but if you make this your top priority, you’ll be ahead of the game—and your kids will thank you for it later.
Consult with a Richmond, Texas, Divorce Lawyer
Even if your divorce is a three-ring circus, there are things you can do to help protect your children from the melee. If you’re considering divorce, contact The Vendt Law Firm, P.L.L.C., in Richmond, Texas. Richmond divorce attorney Frank J. Vendt has the experience, knowledge, and compassion to help you put your children first—as you move through the process with courage and dignity. To schedule a consultation with Mr. Vendt, call our office today at (832) 276-9474 or send us an email through our online contact form.